5 Reasons Why Singleness is Better than Marriage (and Vice Versa)

Jonathan Pokluda | 06.15.14

I work in a young adults ministry. Considering marriage statistics for our generation, that basically makes it a singles ministry—or, based on responses to our dating series, perhaps a don’t-want-to-be-single ministry.

But being a single Christian can be a good thing. It doesn’t mean you’re “broken,” any more than the fact that everyone is broken. The Bible actually speaks pretty highly of being single, especially in passages like 1 Corinthians 7. If you’re single and feel like life won’t really begin until or unless you get married, you may miss out on all the advantages that singleness has to offer.

Why being single is better than being married:

1. You have more time.

No matter how busy you may already feel, it’s true. In marriage, you’d be spending hours with your spouse or kids that right now you can spend on other things—hopefully good things.

2. You have ultimate flexibility.

As a kid, your parents and teachers told you where to be and what to do. In marriage, your spouse has equal say on all significant decisions. Everything from where you live to what you’re doing this weekend has to fit into both your schedules and goals. As a single adult, you have the most flexibility and freedom you’ll ever have at any point in your life.

3. You can work on yourself.

Getting married won’t fix any of your flaws; it will just bring another person into your mess and shine a bigger spotlight on your struggles. Not saying you have to be perfect before getting married (you won’t be), but your time as a single person allows you to overcome and heal from hurts, habits, and hang-ups before they become even bigger issues in marriage.

4. You’ll have fewer troubles.

That’s straight from Scripture: “Those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this.” It’s part of that whole “marriage is hard” thing. Singleness isn’t necessarily easy, but it is simpler.

5. You can focus on God.

“An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs—how he can please the Lord. But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world—how he can please his wife— and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. But a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world—how she can please her husband. I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.” – 1 Corinthians 7:32b-35

With a list like that, you may wonder why people would get married. My intent is not to say “don’t get married,” but simply “use your singleness well.” Don’t wait in a holding pattern until marriage; make the most of the life stage you’re in. Instead of focusing on losing the gift, focus on using the gift.

If you are married or are considering marriage, don’t despair; come back next Monday for part two, “5 Reasons Why Marriage Is Better Than Singleness.

How are you using your season of singleness?

- JP

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