Real Repentance

All right, Porch. How are we doing? Are we doing okay? Great to see you. Welcome. It's so good to have you here in the room. We do not take it for granted that you would give us your time here this evening, not just those of you who are here, though it's wonderful to see you (thanks so much for making time to join us), but also all of you who are tuning in online right now, particularly all of our Porch.Live locations.

I want to give a special shout-out to Porch.Live Wheaton, Fort Worth, and Dayton. It is a joy to get to be a part of what God is doing amongst a generation of young adults, not just in Dallas, not just in America, but all over the globe. We're going to talk a little bit more about that, which is why we have been particularly in this series, but I just want to set things up for us tonight by leading off with a story.

Last week, when I was beginning to plan this message, it did not occur to me until that time that it's almost exactly 10 years from the date that some of my very best friends and I planned what was going to be the trip of a lifetime. At that time, I had just graduated college and was working in the young adult world, and my buddies were still finishing up their master's degrees at Texas A&M.

We thought, "Man, we've got to round this thing out in style. It has been an amazing four or five years, all of us together, and we have to close this chapter of life in the biggest, best possible way." So we decided to take what was going to be the college cruise of the century. You see, everybody we knew and everybody we would want to know was going to be on this specific boat, people from different universities all around the nation descending onto this ship for a five-day Caribbean island-hopping adventure.

It was going to be awesome…that is, until I visited with my then girlfriend (now wife) Brooke and learned that we also happened to have her sister's wedding that exact same week. All of my excitement was instantaneously replaced with regret. The reason is I had made a massive mistake. I had already given her my word that I was going to go to the wedding with her. This was the woman I intended to spend the rest of my life with. These were her family members and, thus, my future in-laws, and I needed to make every effort to be there, but I had already put money down on this trip.

So, I found myself double booked, and not the kind of double booked where it's like, "You know what? I have two lunch appointments, and I have to find a way to make one off and make one work." No. I was double booked between two of the more important events that would ever take place in my life. These were my best friends, the guys who stood with me in my wedding. This was our final hurrah. I had already paid the money, yet this was my future wife. So what did I do? I ate the ticket, I went to that wedding, and I have learned the dangers of double booking ever since.

Now let me ask you… Do you think that was an easy decision for me to make? No! Of course it wasn't. These were my best guys. This was the trip of a lifetime. Yet, what I knew in this moment was that though it was not an easy decision to make, it was an easy decision to stand by. I knew what was right, and although I hated to miss this trip, I knew I would always regret taking it if I went, because Brooke mattered more.

Why do I tell you all this? You see, in this life, you will find yourself similarly double booked, in compromising positions of panic, torn between two loves, that which you want now and that which you want most, and it will be the result of some mistake you made, some error you caused, some decision that went wrong, and what you do in that moment has the power to either fill you with relief or flood you with regret.

You see, in that moment, you have to make a decision. What is the decision? You need to make the decision to repent, what the Bible talks about as a changing of mind that leads to a changing of life. You don't stay the course, keep your plans, jump on the boat, and go on that spring break adventure. Instead, you decide to bite the bullet, eat the cost, take ownership of the mistake, and change your ways, because God matters most. You return to the one you love.

How do you do this? Well, that's what I want to talk with you about tonight. So, if you have a Bible with you, you can open it to 2 Corinthians, chapter 7. If you don't have a copy of the Scriptures, do not fear. We'll have them on the screen behind me. We've been in a series called Revive, and over the course of this series, we've been unpacking these different principles of personal renewal.

The reason we've been doing it is it is undeniable that there is a surge of spirituality sweeping not just across our nation but across the globe. I will not bore you with the data. You can go back and listen to other talks, but the statistics are staggering. What we see is that where Christianity was previously in a cycle of terminal decline, within the last year or so it has reversed. We see young adults, young men and young women, leading the charge as people are coming back to Christ and joining into his body in ways that we have not seen in so long and dared fear we would never see again.

Here's our conviction as we see God moving all across the world. I unapologetically want to see him move here. I desperately want to see God work in this room. I want you to believe that Jesus Christ lived and died and rose forth from the grave to give you a scope and scale of life that transcends what so many of you have settled for. He has come to give you something bigger and better and grander and greater than what you have likely allowed yourself.

The way we get there is not by praying to God for widespread revival, though we should do that; it is, first and foremost, by praying to God that he would bring about inner renewal. It has been our conviction from this stage in this series that you do not find revival by seeking revival; you find revival by seeking renewal. Widespread revival begins with inner renewal.

What do I mean when I talk to you about this idea of inner renewal? What I'm talking about is a recalibration of your inner man or inner woman around the person of Jesus. What is so fascinating and not coincidental in the slightest is that as we started preaching this idea just weeks ago, the Bible Society released an article that quoted and coined the phrase over the current outpouring of God's Spirit in our world as a quiet revival.

This revival movement we're seeing, not just in the United States but in England, in Wales, in Finland, in Australia, and in other parts of the world… We're realizing it is marked by subtlety and sincerity. There is a simplicity to it. Where so many people expected a lavish movement of the Spirit or anticipated that there would be this widespread outpouring that would call people to their knees, instead, it is not as widespread as it is individualized. God is working in the private places of hearts like yours more so than in the public places of arenas, coliseums, and spectacles alike.

I want renewal for you, because I believe it's through your renewal and your renewal and your renewal and your renewal and your renewal (who's not looking at me) and your renewal that God will generate revival. Let me just say, as I've said from this stage, I don't need us to be the apex of awakening history; I just want to be a part of awakening history. I want there to be a movement of God that transcends my ability in communicating, our ability in singing, our leaders' ability in hosting.

I want there to be something so inexplicable about your time here at The Porch that it's not The Porch's name you remember; it is the name of Jesus Christ you remember, that his presence would be in this room and you would sense that. Like, it would actually be mediated by your senses. It wouldn't just be something you know or something you feel; it would be something you experience.

So, what we've talked about… The first principle of renewal was that you had to break up the fallow ground. You had to break up your hard-heartedness. The second one we talked about is you had to cultivate hunger, a longing, a yearning, a desire for more of God. What we're here to talk about tonight is this third principle of renewal: you must radically repent. The reason we're getting into it is because I think so many of us believe we know how to repent, but we do a terrible job of it. Therein lies the issue. We do not know how to repent. So, I want to talk to you about how we do that together.

We see it in 2 Corinthians 7. I think 2 Corinthians 7 is a perfect passage to talk about this idea of repentance, because I am not sure that there is a passage of Scripture that better unpacks the nature of repentance. Yes, you see repentance all over the Scripture. You see it in Psalm 32. You see it in Psalm 51. You could pick any other passage and teach this idea, but what we see here is the essence of what should be true for those who want to rightly repent.

Now, before we read it, we're seven chapters into this letter, and what we're going to find is this is actually not a discourse; it's a narrative. Paul is telling a story of sorts, so we need to catch up to what's happening in the story. We need to know that things were going badly amongst the Christians in Corinth, and after having failed once through a previous visit to get them back on spiritual track, Paul sends his friend Titus with a strong letter of rebuke to try to spiritually recalibrate them.

Paul is unsure of how it's going to go, but then Titus returns and gives a positive report of his time with the Corinthians. He even tells Paul that his letter worked. So, it's that letter Paul is going to reference as we read together 2 Corinthians 7, starting in verse 8.

"For even if I made you grieve with my letter, I do not regret it—though I did regret it, for I see that that letter grieved you, though only for a while. As it is, I rejoice, not because you were grieved, but because you were grieved into repenting. For you felt a godly grief, so that you suffered no loss through us."

So, what was Paul's letter about specifically? Well, we don't know. Scholars are torn on the issue. They debate. Perhaps Paul wrote a letter that was addressing a wrongdoer within the Corinthians' midst who was slandering his reputation and leading them to disbelieve and, ultimately, disconnect from relationship to him. Others think it might have been a reference to his first letter to the Corinthians.

We're not sure, but what we do know is that this letter achieved its intended effect. It ultimately accomplished its goal in that it looked to the Corinthians, it exposed them of their sin, and then it caused them sorrow. It led them into grief, as Paul describes it, which is important for our purposes as we consider repentance in our own lives.

1. Real repentance begins with feelings of sadness. Now, to be clear, Paul does not delight in calling them out. He's not a keyboard warrior who gets a rise off of ripping people in the comments. That's not his thing. He doesn't just stroke together a letter the likes of which will leave them shuddering as they try to go to sleep. That's not who Paul is. That's not his heart. He is not an Enneagram Eight trying to challenge anyone who might come across his midst.

Paul says he regretted the pain he caused them. In another part, he says he is filled with tears at the thought of them. He does not want to cause them pain, yet he learns that they were grieved into repenting, and he says, "This was worthwhile." You see, according to Paul, the prize of repentance is worth the high price of tough love.

What's tough love? It's that idea of telling something to someone that they do not want to hear, though they need to hear it because it is the most loving thing for you to say to them. This is exactly what Paul has just done in this moment. Why has he done it? Because he wants to call them to repentance, and it was achieved.

Now, why is repentance something worth rejoicing in? We need to understand what repentance actually is. You see, the Greek word for repentance is the word metanoia. We could get into the architecture of how that word is put together, but what you need to know is, very simply, that word means to change one's mind. It is always applied within the Scriptures in the context of someone's sin.

Now, whenever we're in Christian circles… If you grew up in the church and the idea of repentance was ever brought to the table, what you probably thought was it's a change in action. Like, "Hey, you've got to stop doing that. You'd better stop doing that. Are you going to stop doing that? It's time to stop doing that." That would be the approach to repentance. It's a change in action. Yet here's what I would say. That is not wrong, but that is the wrong place to begin.

We have to understand that repentance is not just a change in action. According to Paul, it is a change in persuasion. It's an emotional shift that leads to a behavioral shift. That's how he's unpacking it here, which makes sense. You throw a punch because you're angry. You laugh because you're happy. You repent because you're sad over your sin. It's a natural cause and effect. There is an emotional reaction that leads to a behavioral re-action.

Too often, we're really bad at this. We choose to specialize in one or the other. We specialize in emotion or we specialize in action. Some of us are all emotion and no action when it comes to our repentance. We feel a guilty conscience. We feel bad about the sin we've done, but we do nothing about it. This is the guy who shows up to group and says, "I slipped up again," but never actually takes matters into his own hands and does something about it.

This is the girl who confesses to gossip and slander, speaking down at someone else's expense to make themselves feel better, but never actually changing the words they say following that moment. All emotion, no action. The Scriptures decry this kind of behavior. James 1:22 says, "But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves." In Luke 6:46, Jesus says, "Why do you call me 'Lord, Lord,' and not do what I tell you?"

There's a second group that's all action with no emotion. This would be the idea of mindless compliance. It's doing all of the right things but with all the wrong heart. It's legalism. Jesus has just as much of an issue with this, for he says in Matthew 15:8, "This people honors me with their lips, but their heart is far from me…" David says in Psalm 51:16-17, "For you will not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it; you will not be pleased with a burnt offering. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise."

Do you hear what this is all saying? You see, repentance is felt inwardly, but it is seen outwardly. It is both. It must impact your heart, but then it impacts your life. The strength of your emotions directly correlates to the strength of your actions. So, let me give you an example in a different kind of emotional example.

When I was in college, one of my very best friends started dating this girl. We knew he really liked this girl because he decided on their very first date to take her to the most expensive restaurant in town. I do not recommend this, fellas. Don't set the bar so high. Otherwise, there's nowhere else to climb.

He did this for himself. He put the bar as high as humanly possible. He really liked her, and the reason we knew this was he was really willing to take her to this restaurant. You see, the strength of his emotion correlated with the strength of his action. In the same way, the strength of your sorrow directly impacts the strength of your repentance.

Some of you may be thinking, "But, Kylen, I don't feel sorry over my sin. I did. At some point in the past I was heartbroken over it, guilt-ridden about it, stricken to my core, yet I don't hurt any longer over it. Are you telling me, then, my repentance isn't real?" No. The level of your emotion is not the barometer of your spiritual status before God, but the Scriptures are clear. Your level of emotion says something about the seriousness with which you deal with your sin. If you do not feel something, then the Enemy is not knocking at your door; he is already sitting at your table, and you are more entangled than you might realize.

So, what do we do? Well, we keep going with Paul, because as he walks on, he tells us, in verse 10, "For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death." You see, the other side of your grief is repentance. You don't lean away from it; you lean into it.

It was interesting. In a recent study by the American Psychological Association, researchers asked participants to name their single biggest regret in life, and the findings were fascinating to the researchers. They expected most responses to regrets to be around things people should have done, yet what they found was that most people's regrets were not around things they should have done; the regrets were around things they could have done.

So, instead of "I really should take that 9-5 job," people regretted, instead, "I could have lived my life working for something I loved." Do you see the difference? One is all about "I should do responsibility"; the other is "I could pursue the possibilities." To summarize it more simply, most people wish someone would have stopped them from pursuing what they should be doing with their life and, instead, would have pushed them toward what they could have been doing with their life.

I feel like this is the heartbeat of young adults, that we desperately want to be connected to something great, to something purposeful. This is the good news of repentance. It leads you into this kind of life. It's not just saving you from the kind of life you should be living; it is releasing you into the kind of life you could be living. That's what Paul says. He says, "For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation…"

He's speaking to a group of believers in this moment, so he's not talking about that movement from death to life, though that is available through a godly grief over your sin. He's saying, "Hey, the resurrected life is available to you right now, and your godly grief that leads to repentance makes that kind of life available, the kind of life where you walk with God."

We say that, and we think it's so normal. That's not normal! Walking with God is amazing. How crazy is that idea? The one who spun the cosmos into existence, who threw the stars across the sky, who littered the world with all its creatures… That same God will walk with you. He's available. He's not just available; he is actually inviting you in. That's the kind of life that is available, and godly grief leads to it. If you would repent, this is what's on the table for you, the life you could be living.

Yet, there is a catch. Isn't there always with Christianity? The catch is this life is only available through godly grief. "So, you're telling me that my sorrow isn't enough, that if I feel bad about the things I do that are wrong, all the immorality that I know is true of me… If I just feel bad about that, that's not enough, Kylen? I thought you just said the beginning of repentance is sadness." Yes, but it's a particular kind of sadness, and that sadness is godly grief.

2. There is a difference between godly grief and worldly grief. You have to know the difference between these two things. The opposite of godly remorse for sin is not remorselessness, that you're a stone-cold killer, that you're emotionally sterile, that you never feel anything ever at any point toward anyone. That is not the opposite of godly remorse. It's not remorselessness; it's worldly remorse. Do you see it? It's not apathy; it actually disguises itself to look and feel the same.

How, then, do we know the difference between them? Well, here's what you have to know. Godly grief is sad over the sin it has done; worldly grief is sad over being caught for the sin it has done. That is the difference in the two. One grieves because its sin grieves the heart of God; the other grieves because its sin has now grieved its heart in some way.

Godly grief is a grief that looks like God's. It breaks his heart; thus it breaks yours. It's on his mind; thus it's on yours. If he feels a certain way, then you do too. Worldly grief is different. So, let me just tell you three ways that worldly grief can show up in your life. That way, you can diagnose right here, right now. You can assess when it comes to the things you feel bad about if it's godly or worldly grief you are succumbing to.

The first way worldly grief presents itself is as regret over the circumstantial consequences of your sin rather than the spiritual consequences of your sin. This is the classic political or professional athlete apology you see when they did something wrong that they don't actually feel bad about, yet they are held accountable to saying something.

They don't actually feel grief over what they did; they feel grief over what that is now doing to them. Do you see the difference? You see, they hate the fact that "I guess my reputation is now tarnished. I guess my approval ratings have taken a dip. I guess I have to pay that fine at this point." Their grief is over the consequence of sin; it's not over the sin itself. That's the first way.

The second way is regret from something you did that you can never recover from. This is the big bad. This is the skeleton you have locked up in your closet that you hope no one will ever see. This is that thing that you have committed to taking to your deathbed, which maybe sounds a little bit dramatic, yet I know it's true for some of you. There are sins in your life that you look at and say, "If people knew about this, if they actually were aware, they would not think the same of me. They would never invite me around. My reputation would be utterly ruined. I would never be looked at the same way."

So you think, "Because I can never recover from this, I must then never truly repent of it." Here's the thing. You regret it deeply, but if Satan can't keep you from regretting your sin, then he will keep you from enjoying God's forgiveness. He will keep you locked up with that sin, that big bad, that thing you could never let see the light of day, because then you're powerless against him.

The third way is regret for some sin that will inevitably happen again. Sure, you hate that you do this, yet you silently resign to the fact that it's going to happen again. "I'm an angry guy. I want to be better, but I can't help that I'm just angry. I'm defensive when conflict rises. That's just my natural propensity. I'm an escalator. I want to get better at that, but it's always going to be a part of who I am."

Or "Man, I don't want to lust, yet it's hard for me to ever think about a world in which I won't just have eyes for my wife. I'm always going to have eyes for other women." Or it's that idea of "I'm always going to go stress shopping, because that's the way I deal with the chaos in my world" or "I'm just going to have another drink, because I only know how to unwind in a world where I'm having a drink" or "I'm just going to have another drink because that's the only kind of world where I can have fun."

You see, you don't actually believe you can repent, that things can change. This should be good news to you, because it is a declaration from God that they can. Maybe you feel locked up in this thing, but you don't have to remain locked up therein, for Christ has entered into your cell. He has broken open the gate and walked out innocent himself that you might walk out innocent as well. This is the invitation.

Worldly grief doesn't grieve over the effect sin has on God; it grieves over the effect sin has on you. That was John the Baptist's beef with the religious leaders in Matthew 3. "But when he saw many of the Pharisees and Sadducees coming to his baptism, he said to them, 'You brood of vipers! Who warned you to flee from the wrath to come? Bear fruit in keeping with repentance.'" These guys were just doing the right things when people were watching. They were not doing the right things regardless of who was watching. Godly repentance always does right no matter who is looking on.

So, how do you know which grief you feel? Whenever you're caught in gossip or defensive in conflict, scroll through reels and stop to look when you know you shouldn't, hurt someone's reputation just because you're jealous of them, take credit when it wasn't yours to take in the workplace, or make a joke at someone else's expense, how do you know what sort of sorrow fills you? You know by way of what direction it leads you. A worldly grief sheds a tear but presses on in the direction it was going, while godly grief sheds a tear, turns back, and returns to the home from which it was sent, which is where Paul ends. He says in verses 11-13:

"For see what earnestness this godly grief has produced in you, but also what eagerness to clear yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what longing, what zeal, what punishment! At every point you have proved yourselves innocent in the matter. So although I wrote to you, it was not for the sake of the one who did the wrong, nor for the sake of the one who suffered the wrong, but in order that your earnestness for us might be revealed to you in the sight of God. Therefore we are comforted."

3. There is no repentance without radical removal of sin. We see this is true of the Corinthians' response as Paul details their reaction. He gives you seven signs of their repentance. We'll walk through those in just a moment. He unpacks all of that just to give color to how radically they repented from their wrongs. They acknowledged their errors, and they decided to wage war on that which was waging war on them.

John Owen is the one who famously said, "Be killing sin or sin will be killing you." They made their minds up. "We're going to kill sin." Are you going to make your mind up and kill sin too? Otherwise, it will wage war against you. There is no neutral territory on this issue. Sin does not leave you as you are. It is always plotting. It is always scheming. It is always wanting to pull you down and suck you away from the kind of life God has come to give.

Do you want to live into the kind of life Jesus has come to offer you? Then you have to wage war on that which is waging war against you. It's kind of similar to how my wife responds whenever she finds a bug in our house. God forbid a mosquito buzzes around or a June bug sweeps in or a spider scurries across the floor. It is like Defcon 5 in our home.

It's not just "Take that out!" It's "We have to batten down the hatches. We have to clean all of the baseboards. We have to caulk all of the windows. We have to make sure we decontaminate every square inch of our house. Get out in the yard and spray bug repellant everywhere you can." In her eyes, when there's one intruder that should not be where he is, she goes to battle, and I do too by proxy in my relationship with her.

You must do the same. You must go to battle. There is an intruder in your midst. There is something in your life that does not belong there. Yet so many of us are like, "Hey, good to see you. How are you doing? Make yourself at home." That's crazy! Why would you do that? You might have neutral intent toward that thing. It might feel good when you hang out with it, but it is plotting your destruction.

It wants to make an end of you. It wants to suck the life out of you, wrap its hands around your neck, and choke you of the breath God has come to give. You must smother it. You must eradicate it. You must annihilate it. You must do everything in your power to get rid of it. The way you know if you are is there will be seven signs that it's happening. That's what Paul unpacks, so I'll unpack these with you very quickly.

1. There should be an earnestness to your repentance. The Greek here is the word spoude, which means to move quickly. It's where the word Speedo comes from, which is why people wear Speedos. They need to move quickly through the water. You should move quickly in combat against your sin. Earnestness is important to repentance because it deals with sin immediately, not indifferently. I hope you hear me on this.

The best thing some of you could do here tonight is respond earnestly to that sin that you have treated so indifferently, that you wouldn't think about doing it when you get home, you wouldn't think about taking care of it tomorrow, but you would sit in your seat, you would stay in this room, you would talk with one of the leaders who are going to be down to my right and down to my left at the end of our time, and you would process it strongly. You would pray until you start praying because you're earnest to see an end to it. You must move immediately.

Repentance is a turning away from sin, but earnestness is staying turned away from sin. Some of you need to deal earnestly tonight, and it's the best thing you could do…the best thing you could do for yourself, the best thing you could do for your spouse, the best thing you could do for your children, the best thing you could do for the generations to come, the best thing you could do for those whom your life will touch that you both know and do not know. It's bigger than you. This is bigger than you. Deal earnestly.

2. An eagerness to clear yourself. It's the Greek word apologia, which is where we get the idea of apologetics. It means to present a reasonable defense. The idea here is that we would live our lives in such a way that it would be unreasonable for anyone to think that sin is still true of us. Peter talks about it like this:

"Beloved, I urge you as sojourners and exiles to abstain from the passions of the flesh, which wage war against your soul. Keep your conduct among the Gentiles honorable, so that when they speak against you as evildoers, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day of visitation."

When I worked in college ministry prior to moving into young adult ministry, we had a rule amongst the leaders of our ministry that they should live a lifestyle that was above reproach. What that meant was "Hey, you don't stay over at her house or his house past a point that would be confusing to their neighbors. Get out of there, man. Nothing good happens sitting in the driveway with her. Tell her good night and see her tomorrow."

We would tell them, "Don't wear our shirts or put on Christian memorabilia and go to the bar. It's confusing for people who don't know Jesus. You should present a reasonable defense." We would tell them, "Hey, keep short accounts. Don't let any root of bitterness take hold. Yes, conflict is going to come, but address it peaceably.

Don't do so in a way where we're sitting on opposite ends of the table, getting after each other. Instead, move to the same side of the table and reasonably process the issue, because it's not with them or in you; it's this over here that we have done toward one another." You should behave in a way that upholds the gospel without confusion, Christian. You should present a reasonable defense, eager to clear yourself.

3. Indignation. This is the idea of anger or displeasure. Some of you, whenever it comes to your sin, you're like, "I'm frustrated, man. This thing sucks. I hate this so much." That's good. You should not be upset that that's the case. It's good that you feel indignation, that there is a righteous anger toward that which is unrighteous within you, but here's the thing: don't mistake beating yourself up for beating back your sin. Beat back your sin. Deal with your behavior, but don't get crossed and think that you're the problem. It is the sin within you that is the issue. You must deal with it, for Christ has come to deal with it himself.

4. Fear. This is the word phobos. It's rooted in a word that means to flee or to withdraw from something. This is what you feel whenever you're watching a movie and there's a jump scene. What's your reaction whenever a jump scene happens in a film? You jump, and you try to get away. You try to scurry out of the proximity of whatever is happening in that moment.

That's what this is: your instinct to flee or to separate yourself from whatever is attacking you, which in this case is sin. The application here is that you must separate yourself from sin. You have to stop entertaining it. You have to push it as far away as possible. You must treat it as something that is fearful.

5. Longing. This word means desire or yearning. All of life is either a drawing near or a drifting away from Jesus. Every decision you make…the thoughts you think, the words you speak, the places you go, the music you listen to…everything is either going to lead you near to him or lead you far from him. To be very clear, I'm not saying that anything can separate you from the love of God if you are in Christ, but this will impact your proximity to his presence, your enjoyment of his goodness.

So, in light of longing, you should desire for more of him. Do whatever you can to stay as close to him as possible. I don't know what that is for you. Perhaps the best thing you can do come tomorrow in your quiet time (I'm making it easy for you; I'll give you the agenda right here) is write down what stirs your affections for God. What is it? "Worship music." Maybe, but perhaps it's hanging with friends, sitting by the fire, going for a walk, sitting by the lakeside, or casting a rod and reel. I don't know what it is, but you have to work it out, because those things deepen your longing for God.

6. Zeal. The Greek here is rooted in this word zelos, which means to boil. Your repentance shouldn't just be warm; it should be scalding. This is a willingness to do whatever it takes to honor God with your life. When Jesus spoke about cutting off the arm or plucking out the eye if ever it caused you to sin, this is the essence of what he was getting at.

Too often, we ask ourselves, when it comes to matters of repentance, "How far do I actually need to go?" In Jesus' mind, he's asking a different question. "How far are you willing to go?" There's a big difference there. Too often, we fear going too far so we never go far enough when it comes to our sin.

What does it look like for you to not take your phone to bed but to leave it in the other room? I had a roommate in college. Lust was his thing, so we ripped the door off its hinges so he had no privacy. You're laughing, but we were zealous. We wanted the death of this in his life. We would hit our knees regularly and pray to God for victory.

Some of you need to be willing to hand over your social media account info so people can go in and check your algorithm, look at your Explore page, track what you've been searching, look at your YouTube watch history, or whatever it is. Some of you are like, "Oh my god! That would be really nerve-wracking," because you know you need it. Hand over your transaction history. Maybe you shouldn't be spending money the way you're spending money. I don't know what it is, but get crazy about it. It's worth getting crazy over. It's worth being zealous for.

You have to be willing to go as far as it takes. "But, Kylen, I'm already confessing." Listen. So many of you are too busy confessing and not busy enough repenting. Your accountability groups are just confession groups. You just show up, and you just confess your sins. I know because I was in one. Do you know what changed the game? I started giving people in my groups permission to hold me actually accountable.

What did that look like? They could ground me. "Kylen, we're going to put a curfew on you. Hey, we're going to take your phone from you. Hey, we're going to look at what it is you're looking at." They put parameters on my life. They treated me like a child because I was behaving like a child. This is the greatest thing you could give yourself. Dignify your community to hold you accountable in the ways that you need.

7. Punishment. We won't talk about that, because that's awkward. No, punishment is an odd interpretation here. What he's actually saying is vindication or justice. In the life of a believer, repentance should propel you to a place where you're not just seeking God's forgiveness but seeking forgiveness from those whom you've wronged; that you would pick up the phone and call that person you spoke ill of; that you would sit down over coffee and confess your jealousy of someone; that you would be willing to sit with someone or write them a letter or type them an email, or whatever it is, to simply reconcile the relationship. It's being willing to take matters of justice into your own hands and repair the damages you've made.

These seven signs give you a picture of what should be true in your repentance. If you're looking for a litmus test as to the quality of your faith, then look to the quality of your repentance. It will tell you. I am convinced true Christian maturity is not seeing less of your sin; it is seeing more of it. It is knowing, "I need more of God. I'm far more helpless than I dared thought, but he is so much more gracious than I ever thought to believe."

D.L. Moody said, "Man is born with his back toward God. When he truly repents, he turns right around and faces God. Repentance is a change of mind. […] Repentance is the tear in the eye of faith." I want to love you enough to say tonight, Porch, if your faith feels weak, it's likely because your sin has grown strong. So you must take action. You have to act.

You have to, first and foremost, admit that you're wrong. You have to be willing to look to God, and then look to others and say, "I have been off. I've fronted. I've postured. I've manipulated so no one would know, but I am wrong, and I'm sad over it. I'm grieved, not with a worldly grief but with a godly grief."

You have to confess your need for help. You have to be willing to look to God and to someone else and say, "And because I am, would you help me in these areas of my life? Let me not speak generally; let me speak specifically with you and give you permission to do what it takes to protect me from myself."

Then you have to turn away from your sin. Repentance often feels like a buzzkill, because when we think about it, it's turning away from something that feels good. We can admit that. Sin wouldn't be devious if it didn't feel good. Yet, it is turning away from what feels good and turning toward that which is better.

"But what about my porn addiction?" Jesus is better. "But what about my control issues?" Jesus is better. "But what about all of my body image problems?" Jesus is better. Turn around and realize it for yourself. Take the first step and know that the step you've taken is not one that Christ has not taken himself, for he stepped out of heaven and into earth, and he moved with a kind of emotion that was characteristic of the sort of sadness your repentance should feel, because he was sad about the disconnect you had from God.

He moved in, and he wanted to bring you back to himself. He did everything it took in order to cross the chasm and bring you in right relationship. Yet, he not only shed the tear of faith, but he was filled with the kind of grief that should be characterized by you in your sin. He felt not a godly grief; he was a God in grief, moved by his compulsion and love for you to do whatever it took, even die your death upon a cross.

Then he moved from that place, knowing there needed to be a radical removal of your sin. He said, "Do you know what will radically remove you from your sin? My resurrection. For though I die because of your sin, I will rise forth out of your sin, and I will take you with me if you will place your faith in me. I will radically remove you from all that is wrong, and I will radically restore you to all that is right."

Jesus has taken the first step. He has shed the first tear. Will you take a step here tonight? Not tomorrow, not the day after, not next week when it's convenient…right here, tonight, because he has already stepped toward you. Will you shed a tear, for Christ has shed a tear to save you unto himself forever? Let me pray for you.

God, we love you. Thanks for tonight. You and I visited earlier about this. God, we might see the firstfruits of repentance here, but we will not see the full effect here, for repentance does not happen only in an evening; it happens day by day, moment by moment, from this evening henceforth. I pray, God, please, change minds here. Turn people from their sin that they might change their lives and walk with you instead.

I feel a sensing from the Spirit that some of you here do not know Jesus, and he's calling you to turn around. He's calling you to come home. He's telling you, "Place your faith in me. I'm good where you are not. I am right where you are wrong. I am perfect for all of your imperfection. Place your faith in me. Call me the Lord of your life and walk with me as I lead you into your own."

Others of you have been harboring that thing which you have hidden for so long. You have been struggling with that sin, and it's time to make an end. Let victory ring out in this place. Take action, for Christ himself has taken action for you. We love you, Jesus. Thank you for tonight. It's in your name we pray, amen.